How Rude...

Rudeness. Its the big buzz on all the major web-news sites today. This coming two days after Kanye West "rudely" (and drunkenly) interrupted Taylor Swift's acceptance speech at the MTV Video Music Awards. This is funny all on its own because MTV still has the VMA's when we all know that MTV hasn't played an actual music video in forever. But I digress. Kayne's outburst comes only a day after Serena Williams f-bombed and threatened a line judge with a tennis ball at the U.S. Open (not making the news - Roger Federer did the same thing yesterday). Serena's outburst comes only days after Joe Wilson called President Obama a liar during his health care speech. Whether Beyonce deserved the award over Taylor (who cares?) or whether Serena actually committed a fault during the tennis match or whether Obama is a liar or not is beside the point (all parties have issued apologies by the way, as if that means they won't do it again). The question being raised today by many media outlets is, "Are we becoming less civil as a nation?" or as Foxnews.com puts it, "Is RUDE the new Norm?"

I don't know how each of these news outlets will answer the question (a CNN.com poll shows that 90% of 124,944 online voters think that society is becoming less civil), but I have my own thoughts regarding our nation's rudeness and civility. I'll give three of them...

1. One reason that we are a "ruder" nation (or as I call it, "French") is that the definition of tolerance has changed so much in our post-modern culture that no one knows who will be offended and who will be considered rude. I was amazed that some people actually thought Perez Hilton was "out of line" when he blasted Carrie Prejean for speaking against gay marriage. However, many people supported Hilton as well. I imagine there are some people who think that Joe Wilson was a hero for yelling out "You Lie!" Others think he should be fired. The problem is that the line for rudeness and acceptability is so blurred that it depends entirely on the people involved and which news organization is covering the outburst....which brings me to my next point....

2. Generation Me. This is what many are calling the newest generation. We have become a nation of spoiled narcissists who think that we can do whatever we, want whenever we want, at whatever the cost. This, according to the study linked above, is the most self absorbed generation in history. Everything screams "me." Everything is individualized, personalized, and is catered to you the consumer. There is no "making due." If it doesn't work to fit what you desire don't worry, there's a new one coming out next week to meet all your needs. This over indulgence on self breeds extreme lack of social skills which breeds rudeness. Remember when your parents told you to share? Remember when your parents taught you how to act when you go to someone else's house? To be kind. To know when to say please, thank you, yes ma'am, and yes sir. Why should anyone have to say those things when we don't interact with anyone. We just point, click, type, post, shop, play, watch, and listen to everything...usually online. We all have "personal computers" and "i"pods. So why not be rude? You're just another person who, in 5 minutes, I won't remember anyway because I'll be back in my world.

3. The final contributing factor to our rudeness is the decline in family. Here I see two main factors in the family that have paved the way. The first is what I alluded to previously. Parents don't parent. For a variety of reasons parents have abdicated their roles and are passive friends to their kids who want their babies to feel like kings and queens. Parents don't correct for fear of losing their kids, making them mad, or hurting their self-esteem. Also, parents themselves are entirely narcissistic and put themselves above their children so parenting is a terrible burden rather than a burden of blessing. The other main family factor is the absent father syndrome that plagues our country. When the father is gone the mom has to work. When both of these things happen authority is gone. When authority goes society goes. 70% of African American children are born without fathers in the picture. I don't know the number for others but with the divorce rate remaining at 50% the number is bad. And, if the dad is physically at home he is checked out and somewhere else mentally and emotionally. Last Sunday at church I was carrying Truett into church in our Ergo baby carrier. My pastor made the comment, "Its so good to see dad carrying the baby." I've been a dad for about 10 minutes and I feel that burden but I also feel the selfishness tearing at me.

The reason we are a rude nation is because we are a selfish nation. Selfishness is the root of all sin. It started in the garden when Adam and Eve said to God "We don't need you. We can be just like you" (my paraphrase). It continues today. The glorified celebrities in this country aren't the problem (although they certainly don't help), our envy of such people with such stuff is our problem. WE WANT to be like them. WE HAVE A RIGHT to be just like them. Whether we admit it or not its the way we are. Its the American Dream. Just today at lunch I said to Shana, "I can't wait till we have more money so we can buy better food." Really. I said that. Right after I heard this message in chapel. I am a greedy sinner who battles the American Dream of wanting more and better stuff rather than submitting to God's plan for my life. How do I know its sin? Its not a sin to want things right? Right. I'll conclude with this. Its a sin if you sin to get it, and if you sin when you don't get it. I sinned because I don't have it. Which means I'm not ready to have it and don't need it. This is why Lordship salvation is so important and why the garbage of the prosperity gospel (Joel Osteen, Creflo Dollar, TBN, etc...) is heresy. "God wants YOU to experience YOUR best life now." Just have faith and YOUR territory will increase and all YOUR desires will be met. Just say this little prayer and Jesus will make YOUR life better. Just say you're sorry for those little mistakes that you've made along the way and...well, I think I'll stop now.